Attack of the 50-foot mutant bacon

Giant 'bacon steak' spotted at Pancakes & Waffles
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‘Da Pidgin Guerrilla’ Lee A. Tonouchi is one Pidgin author and playwright. He also sometimes contributes Da Kine 5 Tings We Love to da Honolulu Star-Advertiser. His favorite food is local food.

What da heck’s Bacon Steak? Das what I was wondering when I seen da poster in da window at Pancakes & Waffles. Naturally I had for go in and ask da cashier girl. "So is it bacon or is it steak? Cow or pig?"

Laughing, da girl thought carefully before saying, "Itʻs more pork belly like." She assured me it wuz thick, not thin like bacon. Wuz $5.95 for one single piece side order. Or $11.95 for da full plate, which included two pieces of da Bacon Steak plus two scoops rice and eggs howevah you like ʻem.

Since two pieces of just da Bacon Steak itself would’ve been roughly equivalent to da cost of da plate, I decided on da plate. Cuz if you know me, you know I like da deals. So da way I figured, if you get da plate, it’s kinda like you getting da rice and eggs for free. And who can resist free, right?

When I got home with my order, I wuz kinda underwhelmed at first. I think if I ordered ʻem dine-in, then I would’ve been more immediately wowed. But because I got ʻem to go, dey had for fit ʻem inside that standard white styrofoam plate lunch container. In order for make da Bacon Steak fit, dey had for fold ʻem up pretty good.

Upon taking ʻem out however, I discovered how humang-goso dat thing wuz. Each slice wuz over 10 inches in length and over 3 inches at its maximum width. And wuz approximately quarter-inch thick too. Imagine, quarter-inch thick after frying!

Taste-wise, tasted pretty much like bacon. Well, really good bacon. Usually my preference is for have my bacon super cooked, like make-die-dead burn to a crisp kine. But for this Bacon Steak I actually enjoyed it non-crispy. For eat ʻem, I found I had for use one knife, so I suppose wuz apropos for call this thing Bacon Steak. Kudos to da chef who coined da name for this. I came super full, brah.

Upon reflection, I have come to realize that even though I ate just two pieces of Bacon Steak, it might actually be da equivalent of eating a dozen pieces of bacon. OMG, I just ate 12 pieces of bacon! Be warned: Bacon Steak be tricky like dat!

 

Pancakes & Waffles  

98-1277 Kaahumanu Street, #103

Daily 6:30am - 9pm  

200-7556

 

1284 Kalani Street, d100

Daily 6:30am - 2pm

847-7770